My Morning Jacket

Off-Topic => Off-Topic Ramblings => Topic started by: sweatboard on Oct 11, 2011, 02:26 AM

Title: If Jesus ran for President...and poutine
Post by: sweatboard on Oct 11, 2011, 02:26 AM
A. Republican
B. Democrat
C. Independent

How would he stand on....
Foreign Policy?
Economy?

What other issue would you want Jesus to tackle?
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: Jaimoe on Oct 11, 2011, 10:16 AM
I'd assume he wouldn't be American, so none of the above would apply. However, for argument's sake, I'll say he'd be an Independent and very conservative with a giant environmental platform.
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: megalicious on Oct 11, 2011, 10:31 AM
None of those Tea Party nutjobs would vote for him--they view that whole "love thy neighbor" and "care for the poor" thing as dirty socialism.

;D
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: MarkW on Oct 11, 2011, 02:27 PM
If the real Jesus Christ was to stand up today, he'd be gunned down cold by the CIA.

The The.  1989.
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: e_wind on Oct 11, 2011, 02:31 PM
I'd rather see one of the high-ups from an Indian or Asian religion run for president.

I can hardly support such a hypocritical, brutal leader.
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: Sticky Icky Green Stuff on Oct 11, 2011, 03:00 PM
jesus could never get elected. he's a commie
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: bowl of soup on Oct 11, 2011, 03:19 PM
Quote from: Jaimoe on Oct 11, 2011, 10:16 AM
I'd assume he wouldn't be American, so none of the above would apply. However, for argument's sake, I'll say he'd be an Independent and very conservative with a giant environmental platform.

How do you know?  Have you seen his birth certificate?  Do I need to call Donald Trump?  There's no way he's Canadian - never saw Jesus on skates eating round bacon.  I think Mitt Romney believes Jesus is American for what its worth.
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: Tracy 2112 on Oct 11, 2011, 03:35 PM
Jesus Christ Superstar - Superstar (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IvVr2uks0C8#)
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: Jaimoe on Oct 11, 2011, 04:04 PM
Quote from: bowl of soup on Oct 11, 2011, 03:19 PM
Quote from: Jaimoe on Oct 11, 2011, 10:16 AM
I'd assume he wouldn't be American, so none of the above would apply. However, for argument's sake, I'll say he'd be an Independent and very conservative with a giant environmental platform.

How do you know?  Have you seen his birth certificate?  Do I need to call Donald Trump?  There's no way he's Canadian - never saw Jesus on skates eating round bacon.  I think Mitt Romney believes Jesus is American for what its worth.

Well, he predates North America and he was originally from Bethlehem, that is, if he existed at all. I bet he'd want no part of what's going on over there right now. He doesn't need to skate either since he walks on water.

For the record, our breakfasts in the Great White North are similar to yours (excluding grits), including bacon and sausages. That round bacon you refer to we call peameal bacon and is used more in sandwiches and specialty breakfast meals such as Eggs Benedict.
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: bowl of soup on Oct 11, 2011, 04:17 PM
I got some Inca and Seminole friends who beg to differ with your view.  I'm pretty sure that the Mormons say that Jesus moved to America at some point.  So I guess you're right, the best he could be is a naturalized citizen.  So I guess he could be Govenor of California, but not President.  And I'm sure he would go negative early.  Now, can you explain this:

(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/6c/Poutine.JPG/250px-Poutine.JPG)
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: Taterbug on Oct 11, 2011, 04:28 PM
He would totally legalize the weed.  And Skittles would be the national food. He friggin LOVES Skittles.

(http://media.steampowered.com/steamcommunity/public/images/avatars/68/68d5dacf8329f64ea56692ea5a370a7a65eca166_full.jpg)
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: mjk73 on Oct 11, 2011, 04:42 PM
He would have to legalize the weed to eat poutine. I mean come on, it's totally stoner food.
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: Jaimoe on Oct 11, 2011, 06:28 PM
Quote from: bowl of soup on Oct 11, 2011, 04:17 PM
I got some Inca and Seminole friends who beg to differ with your view.  I'm pretty sure that the Mormons say that Jesus moved to America at some point.  So I guess you're right, the best he could be is a naturalized citizen.  So I guess he could be Govenor of California, but not President.  And I'm sure he would go negative early.  Now, can you explain this:

(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/6c/Poutine.JPG/250px-Poutine.JPG)

Poutine rules, but it's better the nearer you get to Quebec. I don't like the gourmet kinds though that include Italian (includes tomato sauce) and duck. The simplier the better, with just great curds, fries and beef gravy, although chicken gravy is acceptable.
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: johnnYYac on Oct 11, 2011, 08:45 PM
Poutine 2012!

(http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6124/5939776321_d0d042f379.jpg)
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: woodnymph on Oct 11, 2011, 11:09 PM
 ;D ;D  I really have to interject that I just had an in-depth conversation about poutine LAST NIGHT.  I've heard of "gravy & fries" before.... but last night was a conversational learning experience about it!  And now it's posted on the President Jesus thread....... what are the odds?

Much higher than I'd thought, apparently!
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: Sticky Icky Green Stuff on Oct 11, 2011, 11:59 PM
Kinski's Jesus Christ 1/9 [Eng.Subs.] (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZiazgGFoGJU#)
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: bowl of soup on Oct 12, 2011, 09:12 AM
Quote from: woodnymph on Oct 11, 2011, 11:09 PM
;D ;D  I really have to interject that I just had an in-depth conversation about poutine LAST NIGHT.  I've heard of "gravy & fries" before.... but last night was a conversational learning experience about it!  And now it's posted on the President Jesus thread....... what are the odds?

Much higher than I'd thought, apparently!

From Jesus to poutine in one page...thnigs must really be getting better.
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: Jaimoe on Oct 12, 2011, 11:36 AM
Quote from: woodnymph on Oct 11, 2011, 11:09 PM
;D ;D  I really have to interject that I just had an in-depth conversation about poutine LAST NIGHT.  I've heard of "gravy & fries" before.... but last night was a conversational learning experience about it!  And now it's posted on the President Jesus thread....... what are the odds?

Much higher than I'd thought, apparently!

To make things even more artery-clogging, some of the country's fast food chains such as Burger King, Lick's and Harvey's offer poutine as part of any "value" combo.
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President......
Post by: woodnymph on Oct 12, 2011, 08:20 PM
Quote from: Jaimoe on Oct 12, 2011, 11:36 AM
Quote from: woodnymph on Oct 11, 2011, 11:09 PM
;D ;D  I really have to interject that I just had an in-depth conversation about poutine LAST NIGHT.  I've heard of "gravy & fries" before.... but last night was a conversational learning experience about it!  And now it's posted on the President Jesus thread....... what are the odds?

Much higher than I'd thought, apparently!

To make things even more artery-clogging, some of the country's fast food chains such as Burger King, Lick's and Harvey's offer poutine as part of any "value" combo.

;D ;D ;D HAHAHAHAHAH NEW THREAD NAME

Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President...and poutine
Post by: sweatboard on Oct 13, 2011, 12:45 AM
(http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2008/10/10/128681476145507680.jpg)
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President...and poutine
Post by: bowl of soup on Oct 13, 2011, 03:27 PM
I knew it!  I just knew it.

(http://montrealcanadians.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/JESUS-HABS.jpg)
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President...and poutine
Post by: BH on Oct 13, 2011, 03:47 PM
Well if Jesus did get elected President, then we could say that ALL of My Morning Jacket's songs were about the same person!
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President...and poutine
Post by: e_wind on Oct 13, 2011, 04:26 PM
Quote from: BH on Oct 13, 2011, 03:47 PM
Well if Jesus did get elected President, then we could say that ALL of My Morning Jacket's songs were about the same person!

;D
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President...and poutine
Post by: sweatboard on Oct 13, 2011, 04:32 PM
Quote from: BH on Oct 13, 2011, 03:47 PM
Well if Jesus did get elected President, then we could say that ALL of My Morning Jacket's songs were about the same person!

Classic!!!   :thumbsup:
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President...and poutine
Post by: Jon T. on Oct 13, 2011, 08:49 PM
Quote from: BH on Oct 13, 2011, 03:47 PM
Well if Jesus did get elected President, then we could say that ALL of My Morning Jacket's songs were about the same person!

brilliant!
Title: Re: If Jesus ran for President...and poutine
Post by: Tracy 2112 on Oct 14, 2011, 10:22 AM
(http://hollywoodhatesme.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/axl-rose.jpg)