MMJ Music Heals

Started by Mr. White, Sep 30, 2021, 03:32 PM

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Mr. White

My Morning Jacket Music Heals

Music in general heals, but MMJ music seems to have the most healing power for me. I'm coming up on my 11 year mark of being a fan of this band (1st show was the KFC Yum! Center show on 10/29/2010), their music, their commitment to the craft, their outreach to people and organizations in need, their circle of local musicians and friends in the creative world, their collaboration with so many other bands and organizations around the country and the world, their big hearts, their giving attitude, their acceptance of all people, but most of all ... their love for us fans. They consider us fans as friends and family, I'm sure.

Anyway, I wanted to post this to talk about how much mental (and at times physical) pain I've been going through for the past 4 to 5 years and how the band's music and presence in the world have helped me throughout all of it. I keep a journal at work to write down positive thoughts each day (not all of them so positive), and many days, I just write, "Music Heals". Sometimes I tell people I meet that "Music Heals. It Always Has, & It Always Will". This is my mantra. Music has been the most important thing in my 55 years of life on this planet since around age 9 (liked it a lot before 9 but hey...). The Pandemic has forced me off the concert trail that I'd been hitting up pretty hard since 2010. I hadn't seen a show for 1 year and 6 months before last month's Railbird Festival in Lexington to see MMJ. I got the Coronavirus around that time (think it was from my wife who's a CNA at a nursing home that had been working with residents who had the virus, so it more than likely came from her ... that story is in another thread). There are plenty of local shows I've missed recently and more coming up even this weekend that I'm not going to go to out of an abundance of caution. In just over a month, I'm taking my wife to St. Louis for a 3 day vacation in early November to see MMJ there on 11/2/2021. I have been listening to a lot more MMJ lately. I started about a month before the Railbird show and have still been 75% to 85% MMJ (live stuff mostly) since the show on 8/28/2021. I've started paying less attention to News (all of it is bad), and I'm listening to lots more music (again). My wife isn't near as into music as I am, but she does appreciate it and tolerates my obsessiveness ... to a degree. I'm really relying on the Power of Music to help me survive these last few years of my life.

Anyway, I felt the need to share this with you all and wanted to invite others to share how MMJ Music (and any and all music in general) has helped you (saved you).
Kentuckians For The Commonwealth (KFTC) Member Since 2011

crooney

Hang in there, Mr. White!!  Music does indeed heal!  Take care.

Bulldog

Quote from: Mr. White on Sep 30, 2021, 03:32 PMMy Morning Jacket Music Heals

Music in general heals, but MMJ music seems to have the most healing power for me. I'm coming up on my 11 year mark of being a fan of this band (1st show was the KFC Yum! Center show on 10/29/2010), their music, their commitment to the craft, their outreach to people and organizations in need, their circle of local musicians and friends in the creative world, their collaboration with so many other bands and organizations around the country and the world, their big hearts, their giving attitude, their acceptance of all people, but most of all ... their love for us fans. They consider us fans as friends and family, I'm sure.

Anyway, I wanted to post this to talk about how much mental (and at times physical) pain I've been going through for the past 4 to 5 years and how the band's music and presence in the world have helped me throughout all of it. I keep a journal at work to write down positive thoughts each day (not all of them so positive), and many days, I just write, "Music Heals". Sometimes I tell people I meet that "Music Heals. It Always Has, & It Always Will". This is my mantra. Music has been the most important thing in my 55 years of life on this planet since around age 9 (liked it a lot before 9 but hey...). The Pandemic has forced me off the concert trail that I'd been hitting up pretty hard since 2010. I hadn't seen a show for 1 year and 6 months before last month's Railbird Festival in Lexington to see MMJ. I got the Coronavirus around that time (think it was from my wife who's a CNA at a nursing home that had been working with residents who had the virus, so it more than likely came from her ... that story is in another thread). There are plenty of local shows I've missed recently and more coming up even this weekend that I'm not going to go to out of an abundance of caution. In just over a month, I'm taking my wife to St. Louis for a 3 day vacation in early November to see MMJ there on 11/2/2021. I have been listening to a lot more MMJ lately. I started about a month before the Railbird show and have still been 75% to 85% MMJ (live stuff mostly) since the show on 8/28/2021. I've started paying less attention to News (all of it is bad), and I'm listening to lots more music (again). My wife isn't near as into music as I am, but she does appreciate it and tolerates my obsessiveness ... to a degree. I'm really relying on the Power of Music to help me survive these last few years of my life.

Anyway, I felt the need to share this with you all and wanted to invite others to share how MMJ Music (and any and all music in general) has helped you (saved you).

Amen brother Music does heal and totally agree on MMJ's ability to use that power for good wherever they go.

Peace out Mr White and throwing nothing but positive vibes your way.

sillyboob

Can't agree with you more, Mr. White.  Cheers to a continued recovery for you, and here's hoping your wife stays safe with her job.

When the music hit you feel no pain at all!
   - Bob Marley, channeled by Tim Armstrong of Rancid
Cuz it's been so long since someone shattered me.

YimYodd

Quote from: Mr. White on Sep 30, 2021, 03:32 PMMy Morning Jacket Music Heals
 I'm really relying on the Power of Music to help me survive these last few years of my life.

Well said, as usual, John.
Music has gotten me through so much in my nearly 63 years as a human being.
One of my earliest memories is of the Beatles appearing on the Ed Sullivan Show.
Music was a big part of our household.
My older brother was , like most youngsters, totally swept up by the British invasion & constantly played 45 rpm singles. He still plays guitar , his long time nick name is 'Flash Fingers'.
My father was a jazz trumpeter , inspired to a lifetime of playing by Louis Armstrong, Bix Biederbech & Tommy Dorsey.
Our next door neighbor , an Ol' Boy from Kentucky, would play Johnny Cash records.

As the 60s rolled on  I was drawn to Motown (the 2 Marvin Gaye FH covers were so very special to me)
& then Jimi Hendrix.

Into the 70s - my 1st concert (in STL) was Bob Seger opening for KISS. Although KISS was billed as the Hottest Band in the World, Mr. Seger opened with Get Out of Denver & in my opinion Stole the Show.

As the 80s arrived, I started looking backward, exploring the Blues & Jazz.

I was turned on to MMJ when I found the OKONOKOS dvd in my younger brothers' collection.  Loved them immediately , although at first I thought - "Why do they start out some songs slowly , instead of just jamming out all the time! ?" :grin:

The 1st time I heard Wonderful was 3 days after losing my elderly Mother after a 4 year battle w Alzheimers.
Those lyrics helped the healing begin.

4 years ago I lost my beautiful wife, Juls, to cancer.
One of the 1st things I ever said to her was "Your ass , it draws me in like a Bermuda Highway"
One of the last things I ever said to her was, "be right here forever, we'll go thru this thing together....".
We had the pleasure of seeing the boys 7 times together.
We had tickets to 2 more shows the summer she got sick and could not go.
Lots of tears while listening to MMJ since then, but so many memories & smiles.

Going to STL in November (where Juls & I saw them on the rail in front of Carl) with a friend who will be seeing them for the first time.
It will surely be an emotional time for me, kinda like some unfinished business.
I've told my friend I  may cry thru the whole show but will be smiling & dancing  :drum: too!

Then on to Chicago for 3 shows w fellow Forum fan Steve 74.
Juls & I were there for 2 shows also where we met up w you & MRS White, Bulldog & Johnny Yac among many others.
I will be an orthopedic boot, as I am scheduled for ankle tendon surgery a few days later.

So- as we all grow older, we move forward, grieve & heal and KEEP ROCKIN'
My heart pumps away for your loving touch, My Sweet Juls. You know I never, I Never Could Get Enough

APR

Great thread.  Nice to read that MMJ helps so many in such impactful ways.  I put on my headphones and turn up some great sounding MMJ show and tend to feel uplifted and better.    Music heals for us fans and the musicians too. 

sillyboob

Quote from: YimYodd on Oct 01, 2021, 06:12 PM
Quote from: Mr. White on Sep 30, 2021, 03:32 PMMy Morning Jacket Music Heals
 I'm really relying on the Power of Music to help me survive these last few years of my life.

Well said, as usual, John.
Music has gotten me through so much in my nearly 63 years as a human being.
One of my earliest memories is of the Beatles appearing on the Ed Sullivan Show.
Music was a big part of our household.
My older brother was , like most youngsters, totally swept up by the British invasion & constantly played 45 rpm singles. He still plays guitar , his long time nick name is 'Flash Fingers'.
My father was a jazz trumpeter , inspired to a lifetime of playing by Louis Armstrong, Bix Biederbech & Tommy Dorsey.
Our next door neighbor , an Ol' Boy from Kentucky, would play Johnny Cash records.

As the 60s rolled on  I was drawn to Motown (the 2 Marvin Gaye FH covers were so very special to me)
& then Jimi Hendrix.

Into the 70s - my 1st concert (in STL) was Bob Seger opening for KISS. Although KISS was billed as the Hottest Band in the World, Mr. Seger opened with Get Out of Denver & in my opinion Stole the Show.

As the 80s arrived, I started looking backward, exploring the Blues & Jazz.

I was turned on to MMJ when I found the OKONOKOS dvd in my younger brothers' collection.  Loved them immediately , although at first I thought - "Why do they start out some songs slowly , instead of just jamming out all the time! ?" :grin:

The 1st time I heard Wonderful was 3 days after losing my elderly Mother after a 4 year battle w Alzheimers.
Those lyrics helped the healing begin.

4 years ago I lost my beautiful wife, Juls, to cancer.
One of the 1st things I ever said to her was "Your ass , it draws me in like a Bermuda Highway"
One of the last things I ever said to her was, "be right here forever, we'll go thru this thing together....".
We had the pleasure of seeing the boys 7 times together.
We had tickets to 2 more shows the summer she got sick and could not go.
Lots of tears while listening to MMJ since then, but so many memories & smiles.

Going to STL in November (where Juls & I saw them on the rail in front of Carl) with a friend who will be seeing them for the first time.
It will surely be an emotional time for me, kinda like some unfinished business.
I've told my friend I  may cry thru the whole show but will be smiling & dancing  :drum: too!

Then on to Chicago for 3 shows w fellow Forum fan Steve 74.
Juls & I were there for 2 shows also where we met up w you & MRS White, Bulldog & Johnny Yac among many others.
I will be an orthopedic boot, as I am scheduled for ankle tendon surgery a few days later.

So- as we all grow older, we move forward, grieve & heal and KEEP ROCKIN'

Damn, you got me all choked up with those lyrics, especially Golden.

At my next show (NOLA), I'll raise a glass to your beautiful Juls because I'm sure she was a special lady.  Cheers to you as well YimYodd!
Cuz it's been so long since someone shattered me.

YimYodd

Much appreciated, sillyboob!
Here's to NOLA.  :beer:
 A few nights later, on up the River, I will replicate your gesture.                       :beer:  <3  :beer:
My heart pumps away for your loving touch, My Sweet Juls. You know I never, I Never Could Get Enough

ChiefOKONO

Cheers YimYodd!  Great post thanks for sharing and may you have a spectacularly spiritual show!

YimYodd

Quote from: ChiefOKONO on Oct 08, 2021, 01:25 PMCheers YimYodd!  Great post thanks for sharing and may you have a spectacularly spiritual show!

Thanks Chief.
I like your choice of the word spiritual.
I received a heartfelt Personal Message from another Forum member who shared with me his story which , unfortunately, was quite similar to mine.
He wrote how he & his kids continue to attend MMJ shows,  that their music spurs on so many great memories & emotions.
I look forward to a similar spiritual experience at my 1st show without my beautiful Juls.
I'm also glad to be going w my good friend who will get experience this great band ,that means so much to us all, for the 1st time.   :beer:  :drum: 
My heart pumps away for your loving touch, My Sweet Juls. You know I never, I Never Could Get Enough

Mr. White

Quote from: YimYodd on Oct 01, 2021, 06:12 PM
Quote from: Mr. White on Sep 30, 2021, 03:32 PMMy Morning Jacket Music Heals
 I'm really relying on the Power of Music to help me survive these last few years of my life.

Well said, as usual, John.
Music has gotten me through so much in my nearly 63 years as a human being.
One of my earliest memories is of the Beatles appearing on the Ed Sullivan Show.
Music was a big part of our household.
My older brother was , like most youngsters, totally swept up by the British invasion & constantly played 45 rpm singles. He still plays guitar , his long time nick name is 'Flash Fingers'.
My father was a jazz trumpeter , inspired to a lifetime of playing by Louis Armstrong, Bix Biederbech & Tommy Dorsey.
Our next door neighbor , an Ol' Boy from Kentucky, would play Johnny Cash records.

As the 60s rolled on  I was drawn to Motown (the 2 Marvin Gaye FH covers were so very special to me)
& then Jimi Hendrix.

Into the 70s - my 1st concert (in STL) was Bob Seger opening for KISS. Although KISS was billed as the Hottest Band in the World, Mr. Seger opened with Get Out of Denver & in my opinion Stole the Show.

As the 80s arrived, I started looking backward, exploring the Blues & Jazz.

I was turned on to MMJ when I found the OKONOKOS dvd in my younger brothers' collection.  Loved them immediately , although at first I thought - "Why do they start out some songs slowly , instead of just jamming out all the time! ?" :grin:

The 1st time I heard Wonderful was 3 days after losing my elderly Mother after a 4 year battle w Alzheimers.
Those lyrics helped the healing begin.

4 years ago I lost my beautiful wife, Juls, to cancer.
One of the 1st things I ever said to her was "Your ass , it draws me in like a Bermuda Highway"
One of the last things I ever said to her was, "be right here forever, we'll go thru this thing together....".
We had the pleasure of seeing the boys 7 times together.
We had tickets to 2 more shows the summer she got sick and could not go.
Lots of tears while listening to MMJ since then, but so many memories & smiles.

Going to STL in November (where Juls & I saw them on the rail in front of Carl) with a friend who will be seeing them for the first time.
It will surely be an emotional time for me, kinda like some unfinished business.
I've told my friend I  may cry thru the whole show but will be smiling & dancing  :drum: too!

Then on to Chicago for 3 shows w fellow Forum fan Steve 74.
Juls & I were there for 2 shows also where we met up w you & MRS White, Bulldog & Johnny Yac among many others.
I will be an orthopedic boot, as I am scheduled for ankle tendon surgery a few days later.

So- as we all grow older, we move forward, grieve & heal and KEEP ROCKIN'

Yeah, I remember our meet-up before the Chicago show in 2015. I'm so sorry you lost your Juls, but I'm sure the music will be and has been transformational for you. I'm hoping it is a truly lasting healing that you will gain by attending MMJ shows.

We will be in the front row of the balcony in St. Louis (just 15 days away). Don't know if we'll cross paths at the show, but I know it will be wonderful for you and your concert partners. We'll be thinking about you and your love for Juls.

I know the songs and the emotions are difficult for us who feel the power of Music in everything we do. I had to help my father leave us peacefully during his final days/hours in the hospital when he was about to die in October of 2017 (metastatic cancer in his lower spine). He had always loved John Prine (I've shared a lot about my family's relationship with that man and his music in different threads). I was so glad I could share my video I made of Jim and John singing "All The Best" at the Newport Folk Festival of 2017 before he died, while still living at our house. He then told me that was his favorite John Prine song (I had no idea that would be his favorite). I shared it with him before we knew he was bad off and would be going to the hospital in Elizabethtown, and he liked it a lot. While he was there in the hospital, I brought in my laptop computer with some plug in speakers and played a constant loop of John Prine music for him. I kept coming back to that video and that performance of Jim and John. In the end, I played that song and that version only for him as he died. I've shared that video with friends and told the story a couple of times since then, and it always brings to the surface all the pain, suffering, and final moments of his life, but it also brings out the joy Music brought to my father, the memories I have of him playing records on the large stereo unit in the living room before we would all drift off to sleep when I was a child. There are so many memories of Music and how it has healed me that I'll never be able to comprehend it or even share it sufficiently.

I'll write more later. I need to stop now.

Music Heals
Kentuckians For The Commonwealth (KFTC) Member Since 2011

ChiefOKONO

Touching story, thanks for sharing that!!

YimYodd

Quote from: Mr. White on Oct 18, 2021, 01:21 PM
Quote from: YimYodd on Oct 01, 2021, 06:12 PM
Quote from: Mr. White on Sep 30, 2021, 03:32 PMMy Morning Jacket Music Heals
 I'm really relying on the Power of Music to help me survive these last few years of my life.

We will be in the front row of the balcony in St. Louis (just 15 days away). Don't know if we'll cross paths at the show, but I know it will be wonderful for you and your concert partners. We'll be thinking about you and your love for Juls.

Music Heals

We will look for you & Mrs. White before the show.
If we cross paths it will be the 4th different state in which we will have had the good fortune to experience this wonderful Music simultaneously!
Troy & I will be on the aisle , Row E Jim Side.
Your front row balcony seats will also be fantastic.




This is from the awesome tapers archive.org listing from the show Juls & I saw there in 2015.
If you look close at the Carl side pit area, the large purple-ish figure (rockin' a purple tye dye) is yours truly & the small white(haired) figure on the rail is my beautiful Juls.
 :smiley:   
Also in the pit that night were Crispy, rockchalkchampionship, Steve74 & Mike(from Schlaflys). What a great show!

Troy & I will be at the Broadway Oyster Bar (just south of the ballpark) for some pre-game activities if you guys are in the area!
ROCK ON, BROTHER!
 
My heart pumps away for your loving touch, My Sweet Juls. You know I never, I Never Could Get Enough

YimYodd

Continuation of previous post.

Mr. White,
I hope we get The Bear in STL!
We didn't last time , but I got this cool pic of the ceiling.







My heart pumps away for your loving touch, My Sweet Juls. You know I never, I Never Could Get Enough

YimYodd

Continuation of the continuation.....

John,
I'm sure you & Mrs. White have many fun plans for your STL trip, but may I recommend a stop at the City Museum?
Jim has mentioned how much he's enjoyed it when in town.
During the 2012 concert he described  experiencing all the fun ,weird stuff there as "like being on acid"....

Here's my beautiful Juls w the equally beautiful giant geode in the museums' "basement". The flash photography doesn't do it justice, even more beautiful in person - Juls also!






The basement can be reached by riding down the 10-story slide from  the 10th floor above. Mick Jagger mentioned doing just that on the day before the Stones concert  a couple of weeks ago!
There are also caves where bears used to roam & where ,in the days before refrigeration, local brewers stored kegs of beer.

Bears, Beer & my Baby in the Basement made for a perfect day!
Have a great trip! 
My heart pumps away for your loving touch, My Sweet Juls. You know I never, I Never Could Get Enough

Mr. White

Mazda 3 Wreck Damage - Where To Begin - My Morning Jacket


I got in a wreck on the evening of Thursday, November 30, 2017 when turning down the road that is less than a mile from my house in Hodgenville. A pick-up truck slammed into my passenger side and totaled the car. I wound up with 4 broken ribs and some minor cuts and scrapes and four stitches in my elbow. "Always starting over, but somehow I always know where to begin".

Four years ago, at right about this time of night, 7:30 p.m., my life changed forever. I'm having problems physically that are not related to this wreck, but I suspect the trauma of the wreck has done some untold damage on me both mentally and physically that has certainly exacerbated my problems related to my cervical spinal stenosis. I'm relying more and more on the power of healing music, and for several months now, My Morning Jacket have been my primary source of the magic. I'm not doing well, and I need it now more than ever.
Kentuckians For The Commonwealth (KFTC) Member Since 2011

sillyboob

That crash damage looks horrific.  Wishing there was something I could do to help other than sending good thoughts.  Glad that My Morning Jacket is there for you though.  We all know how music heals, but for those of us here, MMJ is something more than that.
Cuz it's been so long since someone shattered me.

ranyart

Damn John that's quite a mess!  I was T-boned in high school just after getting my DL by a car that passed around someone illegally trying to turn right onto the street I was turning left from (meaning they hit my door).  The speeds were obviously not as high as your wreck but it still did quite a bit of damage to the car and my neck got whipped around pretty good which I'm still dealing with but nothing else was hurt.  Fortunately a good friend of mine just happened to drive by right after the wreck and was able to take me home.  I'll never forget the sound it was intense.  And from the karma department the guy who hit me popped up on TV shortly after the wreck complaining that his house was being taken by eminent domain so Kroger could build a new store.

I'm so glad you find some comfort from MMJ's music.  It helps me too.  The other things that help me are a good massage focusing on my neck and shoulders and going to a good hot spring or hot tub is also very helpful.  Both Betsy and I both use a combo CBD/THC topical salve which is also pretty darn helpful.

Mr. White

Quote from: sillyboob on Dec 01, 2021, 10:41 AMThat crash damage looks horrific.  Wishing there was something I could do to help other than sending good thoughts.  Glad that My Morning Jacket is there for you though.  We all know how music heals, but for those of us here, MMJ is something more than that.

Quote from: ranyart on Dec 01, 2021, 04:59 PMDamn John that's quite a mess!  I was T-boned in high school just after getting my DL by a car that passed around someone illegally trying to turn right onto the street I was turning left from (meaning they hit my door).  The speeds were obviously not as high as your wreck but it still did quite a bit of damage to the car and my neck got whipped around pretty good which I'm still dealing with but nothing else was hurt.  Fortunately a good friend of mine just happened to drive by right after the wreck and was able to take me home.  I'll never forget the sound it was intense.  And from the karma department the guy who hit me popped up on TV shortly after the wreck complaining that his house was being taken by eminent domain so Kroger could build a new store.

I'm so glad you find some comfort from MMJ's music.  It helps me too.  The other things that help me are a good massage focusing on my neck and shoulders and going to a good hot spring or hot tub is also very helpful.  Both Betsy and I both use a combo CBD/THC topical salve which is also pretty darn helpful.

That's right, sillyboob. For those of us here, MMJ IS something more.

Ranyart, I've been using CBD/THC "stuff", if you know what I mean, for quite a while (various forms), but the hand balm for me is vital. I use some totally organic kind that's made up in Louisville by Earthy Brown. It used to only be available at some of the local independent grocery stores like Rainbow Blossom and other specialty shops, but now it can be ordered on the Interweb. I also scheduled a deep tissue massage for Dec. 14th. I only get them when I really need them and can afford it. I need it now. Most of my physical issues are probably related to my cervical spinal stenosis. I've gotten a lot weaker and have lost a good bit of my muscle tissue. My hands are less responsive and have begun hurting more than the usual stinging and numbness I've been dealing with since 2014. I've changed my diet to a more Ayurvedic styled one (Ancient Indian diet that I'm not totally able to do because of finances and how American foods are prepared and stored using lots of preservatives and all that). I've lost about 75 pounds and am happy about that, but the loss of muscle tissue and all that goes with that is concerning. I've had some wonderful soul reach out to me with an offer to help with some seated Yoga and possibly some other meditative practices. I'd done some of that a few years ago (2015-2017) through some Mindfulness sessions at my work, but not in a meaningful way in quite a while. I'm not going to give up, but I'm also NOT going to get my spine fused together in my neck. I'm just not. Thanks for listening to me and encouraging me during my time of vulnerability and despair. I'll be ok. I will. The Music Heals, and it WILL Heal Me!

Also, my wonderful wife saves me every time I get down. Without her, I wouldn't be here. I just wouldn't.
Kentuckians For The Commonwealth (KFTC) Member Since 2011

ranyart

Quote from: Mr. White on Dec 02, 2021, 05:07 PMI'm so glad you find some comfort from MMJ's music.  It helps me too.  The other things that help me are a good massage focusing on my neck and shoulders and going to a good hot spring or hot tub is also very helpful.  Both Betsy and I both use a combo CBD/THC topical salve which is also pretty darn helpful.

Ranyart, I've been using CBD/THC "stuff", if you know what I mean, for quite a while (various forms), but the hand balm for me is vital. I use some totally organic kind that's made up in Louisville by Earthy Brown. It used to only be available at some of the local independent grocery stores like Rainbow Blossom and other specialty shops, but now it can be ordered on the Interweb. I also scheduled a deep tissue massage for Dec. 14th. I only get them when I really need them and can afford it. I need it now. Most of my physical issues are probably related to my cervical spinal stenosis. I've gotten a lot weaker and have lost a good bit of my muscle tissue. My hands are less responsive and have begun hurting more than the usual stinging and numbness I've been dealing with since 2014. I've changed my diet to a more Ayurvedic styled one (Ancient Indian diet that I'm not totally able to do because of finances and how American foods are prepared and stored using lots of preservatives and all that). I've lost about 75 pounds and am happy about that, but the loss of muscle tissue and all that goes with that is concerning. I've had some wonderful soul reach out to me with an offer to help with some seated Yoga and possibly some other meditative practices. I'd done some of that a few years ago (2015-2017) through some Mindfulness sessions at my work, but not in a meaningful way in quite a while. I'm not going to give up, but I'm also NOT going to get my spine fused together in my neck. I'm just not. Thanks for listening to me and encouraging me during my time of vulnerability and despair. I'll be ok. I will. The Music Heals, and it WILL Heal Me!

Also, my wonderful wife saves me every time I get down. Without her, I wouldn't be here. I just wouldn't.
[/quote]

That last sentence brought tears to my eyes - tears of joy - because I know exactly what you mean Mr. White.  I agree 100% with the spinal fusion avoidance strategy.  They've offered/threatened to do that to me too and it ain't happening.