BIG TIME comeback

[waxy]

Hello,

I'm making a Big Time comeback, but don't tell anyone.  My lard hand always tells me to make sure I brush my teeth before the circle makes a square, but as we all know Hollywood Squares has the market in that game.  I mean, who doesn't like celebrities on a game show in a square making you laugh and then a big X or O gets put up in pink or blue neon colored lights.  The fact remains that Mrs. Luicia taught me about jellybeans in the 5th grade, only she called the jellybean a penis.  I can't be too sure that Odie was paying attention in that class or if he was daydreaming about fruit roll ups and slapping them across his hib.  Odie was always the kind of kid that would do that, you know the kid that always got good grades and made it look easy.  But the truth is that I was good in school but never had any focus.  I should have taken what Walt Robinson was taking, now that kid had some good "focus" medication.  Ironically we ate Walt for dinner the other night at my mom's house.  My dig dug started the grill to cook Walt, but he almost got burned.  His entire face was engulfed with flames and then he played it off like it was no big deal.  He's that kinda guy, he used to coach little league in the same manner.  He'd be calm until I got to the plate, then he'd let me have it if I struck out.  I would dream of the day I could eat egg rolls in the sky, but it made more sense to eat them at the breakfast table.  I'm not sure what to think about the current state of affairs in Greenwhich, but I will tell you this...Don't ever sneak out of your house eating a plastic tent, it won't go down and it will end up getting stuck in your throat.  Many times my neighbor would sneak out wearing a black hood, but he would always forget to take off the silly hat he had on.  The thing was, he was trying to get caught, he wanted to get caught and he damn well succeeded every single time.  I don't know if he was slow per say, but the french fries were there just waiting to be cracked.  I help the old man in the front door onto game boards at ease, it my calling in life one might say.  But those old men, ha, the really can be funny when you try and tell them to take it to the street.  Most of the time they'll half bunt, half junt...but what can I do?  I guess I could walk to the deli and buy a motor scooter, but that would only complicate things.  See, I don't want to create a surface slippery for the jokes to help themselves from the bumper car.  No, I want to hoist clam saws in the wake of the frog leg hamper.  Point is, I bounce sticks of Japan off my plaid shirt, but only to get things going in the coffee room.  Its usually slow roasted, and a smooth finish, but Frank makes his cup of joe with extra crouse-hinds.  I tried it once, but it just wasn't for me.  I'll give the recipe to my landlord, but he'll most likely have a fit over it and throw a chair into the shrubs, that's what happens when you excite Old Man McIllhenny.  He likes to take baths in the summer time to conserve heat and electricity; he has got some other big-brained ideas, but that's another story.  Happy land is for everyone but the patrolman always finds a way to kick people out.  It's sad how the patrolman doesn't like everyone, but that's his problem, right?  I can find any pants that fit anymore, so I'm just going to build a pyramid and sacrifice my first-born lizard to the people you call County Workers.  Working on the highway has brought allot of perspective to my life, like did you know you can roast a chicken and eat eggplant in the same day without getting ham on your sleeve.  I've seen it folks, so don't question it.  Like some, I love boiling water and watching the paint of the soup handle fall short of the prize, but it is heart breaking to find true love in a den.  Trust me folks, I'm not the type of person that would just shred on the rail and then play hop scotch on the fence, but cross me and I'll play go fish until the cows come home.  I'm all about zinc.  Plow me in the feild and watch me sprout leaves of hair and dog legs.  Have it your way, I'm not trying to stop you. Ladders can be made into a nice meal, but the best part of the wood is the gash you get on you leg when it goes in your mouth.  Comb.  Growing up in the east has afforded me to make fun of beetle bags and hillside charts.  Licking kelp is the only way to learn the bagpipes.  Earlier, I cleaned my hamster cage and then I fought Ben.   :-/  Like I said, you can either win big or eat strawberry plates full of rags and stew.  Who can I count on in the end?  Well, that's up for me to decide, and you to dream about.  Wash your gun maid and get to bed.

Love,
Waxy

[MikeHawk]

paragraphs are soooo overated.

[Golden_Shores]

paragraphs are soooo overated.

Is it possible to be overrated AND underused at the same time?

[Half]

i know SpellCheck had something to do with this

[MikeHawk]

my boy is under attack

[HorkoLad]

this is 100% true, folks...every word of it. Waxy and I are cousins.

[Alligator Gar]

I really hope this means that Waxy will be in Michigan. :-/

[LennytheTent]

i know SpellCheck had something to do with this

or knowing waxy's password

[HorkoLad]

Waxy is easy on the eyes, folks.

[Spider_Beard]

i didn't read that

[Alligator Gar]

I want to be on Waxy's team.

[Georgia_Peach]

Is it possible to be overrated AND underused at the same time?

this quote deserves its own thread