joke

[MMJ_fanatic]

I didn't write either of these so if you don't like them don't sue me:
 
> 1. How Do You Catch A Unique bird?
> Unique Up On It.
>  
> 2. How Do You Catch A Tame bird?
> Tame Way, Unique Up On It.
>  
> 3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
> They Take The Psycho Path
>  
> 4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
> You Boil The Hell Out Of It.
>  
> 5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit A Concrete Wall?
> Dam!
>  
> 6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
> Polaroids
>  
> 7. What Do You Call A Boomerang That Doesn't work?
> A Stick.
>  
> 8. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
> Nacho Ch eese.
>  
> 9. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
> Subordinate Clauses.
>  
> 10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
> Quattro Sinko.
>  
> 11. What Do You Get From A Pampered Cow?
> Spoiled Milk.
>  
> 12. What Do You Get When You Cross A Snowman With A Vampire?
> Frostbite.
>  
> 13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
> A Nervous Wreck.
>  
> 14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
> Anyone Can Roast Beef.
>  
> 15.. Where Do You Find A Dog With No Legs?
> Right Where You Left Him.
>  
> 16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
> Because They Have Big Fingers.
>  
> 17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
> Because It Scares The Dog.
>  
> 18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
> Sanka.
>  
> 19. What Is The Difference Betw een A Harley And A Hoover?
> The Location Of The Dirt Bag.
>  
> 20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?
> Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.
>  
> 21. What's The Difference Between A Bad Golfer And A Bad Skydiver?
> A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang!
> A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.
>  
> 22. How Are A Texas Tornado And A Tennessee Divorce The Same?
> Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer
>
> Now, admit it. At least one of these made you smile! Have a
great day!


A drunken man walks into a biker bar, sits down at the bar and orders a drink.
 

Looking around, he sees 3 men sitting at a corner table.

 

He gets up, staggers to the table, leans over, looks the biggest, meanest, biker

in the face and says:  "I went by your grandma's house today and I saw her in

the hallway buck naked.  Man, she is one fine looking woman!"

 

The biker looks at him and doesn't say a word.

 

His buddies are confused, because he is one bad biker and would fight

at the drop of a hat.

 

The drunk leans on the table again and says: "I got it on with your grandma and

she is good, the best I ever had!"

 

The biker's buddies are starting to get really mad but the biker still says nothing.

 

The drunk leans on the table one more time and says, "I'll tell you something

else, boy, your grandma liked it!"

 

At this point the biker stands up, takes the drunk by the shoulders looks him

square in the eyes and says,

 

"Grandpa,....... Go home, you're drunk!

[SMc55]

> Now, admit it. At least one of these made you smile! Have a
great day!

More than one of these made me smile  :D

[EC]

i love jokes.  thanks!!