Current Complaints

[bowl of soup]

You're killing me Jon.  My oldest daughter had a picture book out last night and many of the pictures were of her with our first dog.  The dog died when my daughter was about 4 and it was really shitty.  We were so worried that the dog would be all freaky and jealous when we brought our daughter home from the hospital - we kept them seperated for a while (I miss being frightened and paranoid first-time parent).  Turned out to be the opposite - that dog loved our daughter to the point that we were convinced that she would turn on us if she thought we were being too hard on our daughter.

Really hope you get your pictures back.  Will certainly make the ones that you do get back extra-valuable.  You've inspired me to back my shit up and be better to our dogs.

[mjk73]

My wife has nixed the planned NYE weekend trip to Chicago because she just doesn't want to do anything. We were staying at my good friends house to visit her and her husband. It was going to be a great weekend of hanging with then, drinking, and eating great food. Now it's staying at home and goign to bed before 10PM on NYE. dammit to hell anyways.....

[johnnYYac]

My wife has nixed the planned NYE weekend trip to Chicago because she just doesn't want to do anything. We were staying at my good friends house to visit her and her husband. It was going to be a great weekend of hanging with then, drinking, and eating great food. Now it's staying at home and goign to bed before 10PM on NYE. dammit to hell anyways.....

Not to butt in, but since you posted it on a forum...

Might you go alone?  Offer her a chance to have a solo visit to one of her friends some time?  My wife and I often do these type of things solo because of the three kids.  This New Years, we're letting our daughter have a birthday party sleepover (her birthday is Dec. 28).  I will take one of her sisters 3 hours drive to my friends in CT for a NYE weekend, sort of divide and conquer.  I get to party with my buddies that way.  She'll head home to Chicago on her own usually once a year.  The same with concerts and movies, though we do actually do some of these things together, with and/or without the kids.

[mjk73]

My wife has nixed the planned NYE weekend trip to Chicago because she just doesn't want to do anything. We were staying at my good friends house to visit her and her husband. It was going to be a great weekend of hanging with then, drinking, and eating great food. Now it's staying at home and goign to bed before 10PM on NYE. dammit to hell anyways.....

Not to butt in, but since you posted it on a forum...

Might you go alone?  Offer her a chance to have a solo visit to one of her friends some time?  My wife and I often do these type of things solo because of the three kids.  This New Years, we're letting our daughter have a birthday party sleepover (her birthday is Dec. 28).  I will take one of her sisters 3 hours drive to my friends in CT for a NYE weekend, sort of divide and conquer.  I get to party with my buddies that way.  She'll head home to Chicago on her own usually once a year.  The same with concerts and movies, though we do actually do some of these things together, with and/or without the kids.

No prob

Going alone is sort of an option but the whole point of my freinds inviting us up for the weekend was to see both of us. Its a freind of 20 plus years (minus about a 15 years gap because of my stupidity) and they've met my wife only once. I

The thing that ticks me off the most is she gets pissed if I'm non commital about stuff, but when I do take a stance and decide we are doing something (which is what she wants me to do as she never wants to make the decision) her answer is 99.999999% no. I'm always dammed if I do damned if I don't. And if I do, she makes it so miserable that I never want to do it again.

yeah, it's healthy  :(

[mjk73]

And now our systems are messed up so I cannot do my normal daily work. In fact I have nothing to do so I guess I'll go home....oh wait, I can't go home early. sumbitch today is getting worse.

[Tracy 2112]

And now our systems are messed up so I cannot do my normal daily work. In fact I have nothing to do so I guess I'll go home....oh wait, I can't go home early. sumbitch today is getting worse.

How's your pee stream?

[mjk73]

And now our systems are messed up so I cannot do my normal daily work. In fact I have nothing to do so I guess I'll go home....oh wait, I can't go home early. sumbitch today is getting worse.

How's your pee stream?

Due to me taking an antibiotic presently it's almost dayglow yellow. Thanks for asking.

[Tracy 2112]

And now our systems are messed up so I cannot do my normal daily work. In fact I have nothing to do so I guess I'll go home....oh wait, I can't go home early. sumbitch today is getting worse.

How's your pee stream?

Due to me taking an antibiotic presently it's almost dayglow yellow. Thanks for asking.

no, no, no, not the color; is it weak? strong? sporadic? dribbly? shot gun? clandestine?

[mjk73]

And now our systems are messed up so I cannot do my normal daily work. In fact I have nothing to do so I guess I'll go home....oh wait, I can't go home early. sumbitch today is getting worse.

How's your pee stream?

Due to me taking an antibiotic presently it's almost dayglow yellow. Thanks for asking.

no, no, no, not the color; is it weak? strong? sporadic? dribbly? shot gun? clandestine?

It's strong enough to blast the glaze off of porcelin.

[Fully]

My wife has nixed the planned NYE weekend trip to Chicago because she just doesn't want to do anything. We were staying at my good friends house to visit her and her husband. It was going to be a great weekend of hanging with then, drinking, and eating great food. Now it's staying at home and goign to bed before 10PM on NYE. dammit to hell anyways.....

Not to butt in, but since you posted it on a forum...

Might you go alone?  Offer her a chance to have a solo visit to one of her friends some time?  My wife and I often do these type of things solo because of the three kids.  This New Years, we're letting our daughter have a birthday party sleepover (her birthday is Dec. 28).  I will take one of her sisters 3 hours drive to my friends in CT for a NYE weekend, sort of divide and conquer.  I get to party with my buddies that way.  She'll head home to Chicago on her own usually once a year.  The same with concerts and movies, though we do actually do some of these things together, with and/or without the kids.

No prob

Going alone is sort of an option but the whole point of my freinds inviting us up for the weekend was to see both of us. Its a freind of 20 plus years (minus about a 15 years gap because of my stupidity) and they've met my wife only once. I

The thing that ticks me off the most is she gets pissed if I'm non commital about stuff, but when I do take a stance and decide we are doing something (which is what she wants me to do as she never wants to make the decision) her answer is 99.999999% no. I'm always dammed if I do damned if I don't. And if I do, she makes it so miserable that I never want to do it again.

yeah, it's healthy  :(

I'd go alone. My husband and I do this frequently. It's her loss if she doesn't go. Also, this sounds quite a bit like passive/aggressive control. You might have a much better time without her there. In my marriage, we both have things we like to do that the other one loathes: I like to go to concerts; he likes to go to ballgames. I always regret bringing him with me when I go to a concert so I've learned to either go with a friend or go alone. Also, with three kids, it makes it much easier on the child care situation. When we get back together, we have a great story to tell the other one and we are the happier for it. It actually is one of the things that make our marriage work. We like to things together too, but sometimes we just need to go do things for ourselves. It sounds like a twenty year friendship might be one of those things that you need for yourself. Don't make excuses for her. Just say that she wanted to stay home on New Years. Your friends will get it.

[blucas]

Taking 2 days off of work to see a show, traveling 7 hours, getting to the venue early to get a good spot on the floor, only to get stuck by a clueless ass who barges in last minute and thinks he is entitled to 3x more floor space than the rest of us and can't manage to keep from falling down repeatedly by shows end.  Grrrrrrrr! 

[Fully]

Taking 2 days off of work to see a show, traveling 7 hours, getting to the venue early to get a good spot on the floor, only to get stuck by a clueless ass who barges in last minute and thinks he is entitled to 3x more floor space than the rest of us and can't manage to keep from falling down repeatedly by shows end.  Grrrrrrrr!

I feel your pain. Sometimes the other concert goers can ruin a great show.

[blucas]

Thx Fully...I am all for the party, but always within the spirit of those who have come together to see the show.  I do have to admit that this could be karma for my behavior at concerts 20 years ago- ha.  ;)

[Tracy 2112]

My wife has nixed the planned NYE weekend trip to Chicago because she just doesn't want to do anything. We were staying at my good friends house to visit her and her husband. It was going to be a great weekend of hanging with then, drinking, and eating great food. Now it's staying at home and goign to bed before 10PM on NYE. dammit to hell anyways.....

Not to butt in, but since you posted it on a forum...

Might you go alone?  Offer her a chance to have a solo visit to one of her friends some time?  My wife and I often do these type of things solo because of the three kids.  This New Years, we're letting our daughter have a birthday party sleepover (her birthday is Dec. 28).  I will take one of her sisters 3 hours drive to my friends in CT for a NYE weekend, sort of divide and conquer.  I get to party with my buddies that way.  She'll head home to Chicago on her own usually once a year.  The same with concerts and movies, though we do actually do some of these things together, with and/or without the kids.

No prob

Going alone is sort of an option but the whole point of my freinds inviting us up for the weekend was to see both of us. Its a freind of 20 plus years (minus about a 15 years gap because of my stupidity) and they've met my wife only once. I

The thing that ticks me off the most is she gets pissed if I'm non commital about stuff, but when I do take a stance and decide we are doing something (which is what she wants me to do as she never wants to make the decision) her answer is 99.999999% no. I'm always dammed if I do damned if I don't. And if I do, she makes it so miserable that I never want to do it again.

yeah, it's healthy  :(

I'd go alone. My husband and I do this frequently. It's her loss if she doesn't go. Also, this sounds quite a bit like passive/aggressive control. You might have a much better time without her there. In my marriage, we both have things we like to do that the other one loathes: I like to go to concerts; he likes to go to ballgames. I always regret bringing him with me when I go to a concert so I've learned to either go with a friend or go alone. Also, with three kids, it makes it much easier on the child care situation. When we get back together, we have a great story to tell the other one and we are the happier for it. It actually is one of the things that make our marriage work. We like to things together too, but sometimes we just need to go do things for ourselves. It sounds like a twenty year friendship might be one of those things that you need for yourself. Don't make excuses for her. Just say that she wanted to stay home on New Years. Your friends will get it.

My wife encourages me to leave the house and do things alone all the time; constantly; several times a day... :-\         

;)

[Fully]

My wife has nixed the planned NYE weekend trip to Chicago because she just doesn't want to do anything. We were staying at my good friends house to visit her and her husband. It was going to be a great weekend of hanging with then, drinking, and eating great food. Now it's staying at home and goign to bed before 10PM on NYE. dammit to hell anyways.....

Not to butt in, but since you posted it on a forum...

Might you go alone?  Offer her a chance to have a solo visit to one of her friends some time?  My wife and I often do these type of things solo because of the three kids.  This New Years, we're letting our daughter have a birthday party sleepover (her birthday is Dec. 28).  I will take one of her sisters 3 hours drive to my friends in CT for a NYE weekend, sort of divide and conquer.  I get to party with my buddies that way.  She'll head home to Chicago on her own usually once a year.  The same with concerts and movies, though we do actually do some of these things together, with and/or without the kids.

No prob

Going alone is sort of an option but the whole point of my freinds inviting us up for the weekend was to see both of us. Its a freind of 20 plus years (minus about a 15 years gap because of my stupidity) and they've met my wife only once. I

The thing that ticks me off the most is she gets pissed if I'm non commital about stuff, but when I do take a stance and decide we are doing something (which is what she wants me to do as she never wants to make the decision) her answer is 99.999999% no. I'm always dammed if I do damned if I don't. And if I do, she makes it so miserable that I never want to do it again.

yeah, it's healthy  :(

I'd go alone. My husband and I do this frequently. It's her loss if she doesn't go. Also, this sounds quite a bit like passive/aggressive control. You might have a much better time without her there. In my marriage, we both have things we like to do that the other one loathes: I like to go to concerts; he likes to go to ballgames. I always regret bringing him with me when I go to a concert so I've learned to either go with a friend or go alone. Also, with three kids, it makes it much easier on the child care situation. When we get back together, we have a great story to tell the other one and we are the happier for it. It actually is one of the things that make our marriage work. We like to things together too, but sometimes we just need to go do things for ourselves. It sounds like a twenty year friendship might be one of those things that you need for yourself. Don't make excuses for her. Just say that she wanted to stay home on New Years. Your friends will get it.

My wife encourages me to leave the house and do things alone all the time; constantly; several times a day... :-\         

;)

;D ;D ;D I gather you get on her nerves ;D ;D ;D ! I can relate though. Sometimes my husband seems a little too enthusiastic for me to go to a show. Apparently I'm much more pleasant if I get out of the house or the house is more pleasant if I'm not there. I'm not sure which one it is. Ahhhh, marriage...

[mjk73]

My wife has nixed the planned NYE weekend trip to Chicago because she just doesn't want to do anything. We were staying at my good friends house to visit her and her husband. It was going to be a great weekend of hanging with then, drinking, and eating great food. Now it's staying at home and goign to bed before 10PM on NYE. dammit to hell anyways.....

Not to butt in, but since you posted it on a forum...

Might you go alone?  Offer her a chance to have a solo visit to one of her friends some time?  My wife and I often do these type of things solo because of the three kids.  This New Years, we're letting our daughter have a birthday party sleepover (her birthday is Dec. 28).  I will take one of her sisters 3 hours drive to my friends in CT for a NYE weekend, sort of divide and conquer.  I get to party with my buddies that way.  She'll head home to Chicago on her own usually once a year.  The same with concerts and movies, though we do actually do some of these things together, with and/or without the kids.

No prob

Going alone is sort of an option but the whole point of my freinds inviting us up for the weekend was to see both of us. Its a freind of 20 plus years (minus about a 15 years gap because of my stupidity) and they've met my wife only once. I

The thing that ticks me off the most is she gets pissed if I'm non commital about stuff, but when I do take a stance and decide we are doing something (which is what she wants me to do as she never wants to make the decision) her answer is 99.999999% no. I'm always dammed if I do damned if I don't. And if I do, she makes it so miserable that I never want to do it again.

yeah, it's healthy  :(

I'd go alone. My husband and I do this frequently. It's her loss if she doesn't go. Also, this sounds quite a bit like passive/aggressive control. You might have a much better time without her there. In my marriage, we both have things we like to do that the other one loathes: I like to go to concerts; he likes to go to ballgames. I always regret bringing him with me when I go to a concert so I've learned to either go with a friend or go alone. Also, with three kids, it makes it much easier on the child care situation. When we get back together, we have a great story to tell the other one and we are the happier for it. It actually is one of the things that make our marriage work. We like to things together too, but sometimes we just need to go do things for ourselves. It sounds like a twenty year friendship might be one of those things that you need for yourself. Don't make excuses for her. Just say that she wanted to stay home on New Years. Your friends will get it.

My wife encourages me to leave the house and do things alone all the time; constantly; several times a day... :-\         

;)

;D ;D ;D I gather you get on her nerves ;D ;D ;D ! I can relate though. Sometimes my husband seems a little too enthusiastic for me to go to a show. Apparently I'm much more pleasant if I get out of the house or the house is more pleasant if I'm not there. I'm not sure which one it is. Ahhhh, marriage...

I wish mine yelled at me go do something. She's way too much of a homebody. It's a nightmare just to get her to be ok with me going to a show. She's gets pissed when I go out because she's not but then when I offer to take her, noooooo. It's gotten worse the last couple years. No clue what started this or how to get her past this.

[Fully]

My wife has nixed the planned NYE weekend trip to Chicago because she just doesn't want to do anything. We were staying at my good friends house to visit her and her husband. It was going to be a great weekend of hanging with then, drinking, and eating great food. Now it's staying at home and goign to bed before 10PM on NYE. dammit to hell anyways.....

Not to butt in, but since you posted it on a forum...

Might you go alone?  Offer her a chance to have a solo visit to one of her friends some time?  My wife and I often do these type of things solo because of the three kids.  This New Years, we're letting our daughter have a birthday party sleepover (her birthday is Dec. 28).  I will take one of her sisters 3 hours drive to my friends in CT for a NYE weekend, sort of divide and conquer.  I get to party with my buddies that way.  She'll head home to Chicago on her own usually once a year.  The same with concerts and movies, though we do actually do some of these things together, with and/or without the kids.

No prob

Going alone is sort of an option but the whole point of my freinds inviting us up for the weekend was to see both of us. Its a freind of 20 plus years (minus about a 15 years gap because of my stupidity) and they've met my wife only once. I

The thing that ticks me off the most is she gets pissed if I'm non commital about stuff, but when I do take a stance and decide we are doing something (which is what she wants me to do as she never wants to make the decision) her answer is 99.999999% no. I'm always dammed if I do damned if I don't. And if I do, she makes it so miserable that I never want to do it again.

yeah, it's healthy  :(

I'd go alone. My husband and I do this frequently. It's her loss if she doesn't go. Also, this sounds quite a bit like passive/aggressive control. You might have a much better time without her there. In my marriage, we both have things we like to do that the other one loathes: I like to go to concerts; he likes to go to ballgames. I always regret bringing him with me when I go to a concert so I've learned to either go with a friend or go alone. Also, with three kids, it makes it much easier on the child care situation. When we get back together, we have a great story to tell the other one and we are the happier for it. It actually is one of the things that make our marriage work. We like to things together too, but sometimes we just need to go do things for ourselves. It sounds like a twenty year friendship might be one of those things that you need for yourself. Don't make excuses for her. Just say that she wanted to stay home on New Years. Your friends will get it.

My wife encourages me to leave the house and do things alone all the time; constantly; several times a day... :-\         

;)

;D ;D ;D I gather you get on her nerves ;D ;D ;D ! I can relate though. Sometimes my husband seems a little too enthusiastic for me to go to a show. Apparently I'm much more pleasant if I get out of the house or the house is more pleasant if I'm not there. I'm not sure which one it is. Ahhhh, marriage...

I wish mine yelled at me go do something. She's way too much of a homebody. It's a nightmare just to get her to be ok with me going to a show. She's gets pissed when I go out because she's not but then when I offer to take her, noooooo. It's gotten worse the last couple years. No clue what started this or how to get her past this.

Not knowing your wife, I'm just going to guess that either she isn't comfortable going out in public for some reason and she may have insecurities about you going out without her. Or she may not like your friends. Or she may just be a homebody. Who really knows. I do know that allowing her to control you will only bring resentment and frustration. You should talk to her about it. Really talk to her about it in a nonthreatening way. Otherwise the frustration is going to build up and then it is going to be much worse. My husband use to hold it in. And then explode. He's gotten better about that as we've gotten older. I'm sure I've grown as well. I don't know how long you've been married, but keeping all of your frustrations in usually doesn't end well. They've got to come out somewhere. A person can only take it for so long. We've been married for over 18 years, and the one thing I've learned is that it's better to talk about it than it is to suck it up. Perhaps your wife has things that she would like to go do. Suggest she go do them. If she gets out and has some fun, it might help her see that you need to go out too.

Also, one last thought. My dad died at 67. My husband's dad died over a year ago at the age of 73. We are both 44, and it hit us that if we live to be as old as our parents then we only have a little over twenty years left for me - a few more for my husband. It changed our perspective on life. We had spent all of our thirties raising our children (staying home to be with them) and now that they are teens and preteens, we are making a point of getting back out into our own lives. We still do plenty of family things. Tonight I've got to go to a play with my youngest daughter that she wants to see. Her friends are in it. I don't really want to go, but she wants to and it's something we can do together. So I guess my point is this: have fun now, you don't know how much time you have left on this earth.

[e_wind]

a good kid who I've known for a long time, but became a friend and not just an acquaintence this summer was found dead in his bed yesterday. he was into some less than healthy shit, but this was basically the last thing I thought I'd hear this morning when I woke up today.

[mjk73]

a good kid who I've known for a long time, but became a friend and not just an acquaintence this summer was found dead in his bed yesterday. he was into some less than healthy shit, but this was basically the last thing I thought I'd hear this morning when I woke up today.

Sorry to hear that.

[Fully]

a good kid who I've known for a long time, but became a friend and not just an acquaintence this summer was found dead in his bed yesterday. he was into some less than healthy shit, but this was basically the last thing I thought I'd hear this morning when I woke up today.

That's terrible. I'm sorry you lost your friend.